Embracing life until your last breath

As an End-of-Life Doula (also known as a death doula or death midwife), I am here to provide non-medical, compassionate, and personalized support to individuals facing an uncertain future due to serious illness, those choosing hospice care, or those proactively planning while still healthy.

I want to help ease fears, provide education, and empower you and your loved ones to live as fully as possible for as long as possible. Let’s connect to discuss how I can assist you on this profound path, allowing you to embrace life fully while preparing for your next chapter.

Meet Michelle

In my experience, death is a powerful teacher. Being deeply present to the natural dying experience and contemplating our own mortality offers an opportunity to change how we live our lives. My own transformational experience came in 2011 when my husband transitioned (passed away) 3 months after being diagnosed with cancer at the age of 46.

This experience cracked my entire being wide open, and my life became a ‘before’ and ‘after’ story. I could tell I needed to create a new kind of life for myself, so I began studying death, dying, and grief as part of my own personal healing. Through this process, I found purpose in working as a Death Doula, Death Educator, Grief Relief Coach and Life Coach.

I created Held with the intention of holding space for end-of-life experiences, whatever they may be. I hope to bring light into the mystery of death and to provide a safe place to confront fears. It is my belief that we are the creators in our own lives, and we can create the life we want until our last breath.

held    Testimonials

“I want to send you a sincere thank you for all of your guidance and wisdom this spring. I truly appreciate how you made me think about grief from many angles. I honestly think it made a huge difference in my healing. You have truly found your calling in being a grief educator and you are blessed with many gifts.”

-Grief Coaching Client-

“Michelle befriended my Dad, validated his choice to VSED, imparted a basic knowledge of the dying process, and brought helpful supplies we didn’t know we needed. Most of all, she wrapped us all in her calm, caring heart. She kept in touch, showed up when my nerves were fraying, and even sat vigil so my sister and I could have a meal together. I am forever grateful, and I recommend Michelle unconditionally.”

-Daughter, Caregiver | Full Review–

“Thank you for facilitating our family meeting about my mom. While I wasn’t sure what to expect, I found myself leaving “feeling lighter” than when I came. I experienced being able to be quiet, listen to each other and make space for some concrete steps that may bring comfort to my mom or each of us.”

-Daugher of Hospice Patient-

“I deeply appreciate the way Michelle uses her intuition wisely and gently, connects easily with people, nudges patients toward self-exploration when needed, is deeply compassionate, and brings her wonderful sense of humor to the work. Her experiential wisdom serves her well; personal losses have opened her heart with great empathy and passion for this important work. Michelle has stretched herself in difficult situations, and I have seen continued growth from those experiences.”

-Nina Guertin

“For the past 20 years, I have hosted a birthday gathering for myself that includes my closest friends, wonderful comfort food and a special surprise guest. This year, I invited Michelle Kolling to facilitate a ‘light hearted’ conversation about death. Michelle’s warm, gentle and approachable demeanor quickly reassured my guests that this was a safe environment to have this dialogue. At the end of the evening, my guests were grateful to have had a shared learning experience, as well as an opportunity for personal reflection and application.

Thank you, Michelle, for opening my mind and my heart. I am grateful.”

-A Dinner to Die For Host-

“I had a chance to look over your work and am truly amazed at her End of Life plan. I have never seen something so spelled out and with such a personal focus. I can just imagine the relief she must feel with her wishes being honored. I am so glad you are doing the work you are doing, and it is an honor to work with you.”

-Hospice Nurse-

My Services

Holistic End-of-Life Doula

“Dying is the last developmental stage as a human.”

~Jane Whitlock (Death Doula)~

As an End of Life Doula, I offer a comprehensive plan of care that is personalized and adaptable to the evolving needs of each client. My four-part model includes a life review, vigil planning, caregiver support, and bereavement.  Interested in learning more? Click the button below.

Ask a Doula! – Education for Death

“Life is a terminal illness which is sexually transmitted.”

~John Clease~

As an End of Life Doula, I have dedicated my time to studying death, dying, and grief, and I have a wealth of resources to offer anyone who is curious to learn more about these issues. By exploring your mortality, you may discover the keys to living a more meaningful, peaceful, and fulfilling life. Ready to have a conversation while you’re still healthy and well? Click the button below to schedule a call with me.

One-on-One Grief Coaching

“You have to open yourself up and let the pain move through you, it’s not yours to hold.”

~Frank Ostaseski~

Even when the death of a loved one is anticipated and planned for, the sudden absence of their physical presence in your life can be overwhelming. Though the pain of grief is unavoidable, the journey through healing can be transformative.

Advanced Planning

“Talking about death won’t kill you anymore than talking about babies makes you pregnant.”

~Unknown~

According to B.J. Miller, MD only a small fraction of us, 10-20%, will die without planning. The rest of us will have time to get to know what will end our lives, and there are choices we can make now while we are healthy. Healthcare planning and advanced vigil planning consultations are a perfect compliment to the financial and estate planning you may already be doing.

Special Events

Living Funeral Ceremony

The living funeral ceremony is an experiential meditation on mortality.

The ceremony is an invitation to connect deeply with the mystery and richness of one’s life. It is an opportunity to reflect on the past, evaluate the present and prepare for the future.

Participants will be guided as they contemplate their personal memorial while imagining parts of their identity falling away. They will complete a writing exercise expressing their last words and wishes, and be gently lead through a death meditation using guided imagery. Past participants have shared that the experience has been life-affirming and even life-altering.

Living funeral ceremonies can be held virtually or in a live, in-person group setting. Private sessions are also available. Contact me for more details.

Living Funeral Ceremony

The living funeral ceremony is an experiential meditation on mortality.

The ceremony is an invitation to connect deeply with the mystery and richness of one’s life. It is an opportunity to reflect on the past, evaluate the present and prepare for the future.

Participants will be guided as they contemplate their personal memorial while imagining parts of their identity falling away. They will complete a writing exercise expressing their last words and wishes, and be gently lead through a death meditation using guided imagery. Past participants have shared that the experience has been life-affirming and even life-altering.

Living funeral ceremonies can be held virtually or in a live, in-person group setting. Private sessions are also available. Contact me for more details.

A Dinner to Die For!

Wouldn’t it be nice if we could talk about death the same way we talk about birth? Sometimes all that is needed is a safe place to start these difficult conversations.

Why not invite a group of curious friends and family to explore these issues together as you are completely taken care of with a beautifully customized, catered dinner experience? After all, these are likely the same people you will want to be with at the end of your life.

I am happy to join your small group to facilitate a safe place to share hopes, fears and honor your experiences around death with laughter and love. Contact me to set up your own “Dinner to Die For” event!

A Dinner to Die For!

Wouldn’t it be nice if we could talk about death the same way we talk about birth? Sometimes all that is needed is a safe place to start these difficult conversations.

Why not invite a group of curious friends and family to explore these issues together as you are completely taken care of with a beautifully customized, catered dinner experience? After all, these are likely the same people you will want to be with at the end of your life.

I am happy to join your small group to facilitate a safe place to share hopes, fears and honor your experiences around death with laughter and love. Contact me to set up your own “Dinner to Die For” event!

Private Workshops

These are custom tailored workshops for small groups where I facilitate discussions around death, dying and the role a death doula fills during these incredibly important times.

Workshops are pre-scheduled virtual or in-person events, where we work together to customize the content to meet your individual needs.

Contact me to schedule your own private Workshop.

Private Workshops

These are custom tailored workshops for small groups where I facilitate discussions around death, dying and the role a death doula fills during these incredibly important times.

Workshops are pre-scheduled virtual or in-person events, where we work together to customize the content to meet your individual needs.

Contact me to schedule your own private Workshop.

How Can I Be of Service to You?

How Can I Be of Service to You?

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